Cornwall, Trains, Happiness, Dreams.

I am currently on the train going back to Cornwall after spending a week in Kingston.
I've been upset about going back before, but never as upset as I am now.
My emotions are all over the place, I'm happy and depressed and it feels like I'm being squished by my feelings.
I know I'll be back in Kingston again in 2 weeks but that seems so far away.

I did what I wanted while in Kingston and I feel like a lot is changing for me in a good way, but I'm scared for a lot of reasons too.
I feel like a mush-ball.
It's kind of mixed up in my head.

So about 2 minutes after my train departed it came to a complete stop for about 5 minutes...now it's stopped AGAIN! I've been on this train for 20 minutes; It's randomly stopped twice.
Now we are moving again, that stop only lasted about a minute.
I don't understand why we keep stopping and there aren't any announcements explaining why either.
Maybe I spoke to soon, they just announced there is a train in front of us, that makes sense.
It's annoying to keep stopping though. I already don't want to go back and when they stop it makes it harder because I could just somehow, maybe, possibly get off the train...it would be a waste of money but it would still be worth it.

I just realized that I forgot my headphones in Kingston, that sucks big time, I think they are in my leather jackets pocket, but my dad gave me his old army jacket so I left my leather one there...mistake!

I can't wait to be back at St. Lawrence just so I can check my mail since I haven't in a week and am expecting things from eBay, I also want to just change into pajamas and work on any homework I have since I HAVE to go back.
I emailed my teachers about how I was missing a week of school but they never replied telling me if I had homework, only one of my teachers did!
I checked everyday too.

A lot of things in my life seem very surreal right now, like a dream that I can at any moment wake up from if someone were to pinch me...or if this train continues to whip me around like a doll much more.
But if this was a dream it's definitely the best one I've had in a LOOONG time and I never want to wake up!
But it's real and it's incredible.
I feel complete and everything feels right.
I feel like now I can accomplish more and put 100% in everything I do whereas before I couldn't because I was being held back by my own issues that-like I said- have been resolved...for the most part, a couple more things to figure out with my health, I am nervous about my MRI results and need to schedule an appointment with my family doctor.
I also plan to get my G2 during reading week.

Well, I am going to attempt to enjoy this train ride and lose myself in my thoughts (and hopefully sleep).

Life Starts Now, am I ready?