Hello,
Things haven't exactly been going completely well for me lately...
We all know I'm sick a lot but recently I haven't been sleeping, I am either up ALL night and day or I get at most 3 hours of sleep, and I have been having a lot of nightmares, realistic, vivid and just awful nightmares...
I have also been getting horrible migraines and feeling very nauseous, I'm also really anxious.
I've been struggling a lot with who I am. I feel like I am losing myself and I am forgetting things a lot.
Almost like blacking out...but I think that is from lack of sleep. The problem is though that I CAN'T sleep. The migraines don't help but my mind kicks into overdrive at night and I can't clear my head.
This morning at 7:55 the fire alarm went off and everyone in residence had to evacuate out into the snowy cold weather. The best part is, I literally got 10 minutes of sleep. I finally fell asleep at 7:45, well, at least that was the last time I looked at the clock before the fire alarm went off.
we were out there until about a quarter after 8 and I came inside and laid in bed for a good hour and a half before finally falling back to sleep and got myself a good 2 hours of sleep or so.
Then my alarm went off for me to get ready for class.
I have an MRI next week, and me being little miss claustrophobic-pants doesn't help knowing I'll be in this super noisy tube for around 40 minutes...
I'll be in Kingston all week and missing classes, so I am talking to all my teachers this week about the assignments I am going to miss so I can stay on track while I am at home.
My friend is throwing a party on the first Saturday that I am back, so that should be a good distraction...though I don't drink...and I've never really "partied" before...So I will be the odd girl there, but I know some of the people that are going, so it shouldn't be too bad, they're my friends and I rarely see them now that I live almost 2 hours away.
I spend a lot of time writing now, more than I used to, in a journal, random poems and crappy songs....When I'm not writing I'm watching movies and TV shows online.
Anything to clear my head of my own problems and pull myself into someone else's life.
I am going to try to...I guess fix myself this February. I have a lot of things planned that I feel I need to do that could really help me.
I am good at messing things up and a lot of the time things backfire and blow up in my face.
But I am going to do everything I can because I am sick of this...
Moving on to a happier topic.
I have been receiving most of the things I purchased on eBay, I'm looking forward to making that "eBay Haul" video, it's pretty good for me to have something to look forward too.
Even more than that though;
I am going to see Marianas Trench on March 28th at the K-Rock Centre in Kingston.
I am beyond excited for that and Lexie will be coming with me!
Since we have no classes on Wednesday, we will probably go to Kingston on Tuesday night and stay until Sunday since the concert is on a Thursday night and we can't really go to all our Thursday classes and get to Kingston and the concert on time and we only have 1 class on Fridays.
I am going to watch more episodes of Lost Girl because I still have to catch up on a few more.
Life Starts Now, am I ready?
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