Eyes Open

Hey there.

So tomorrow is my last day in Kingston, I have major butterflies. I'm not exactly helping myself since I keep listening to songs about saying goodbye >.< lol

At least I'm not moving as far as I have had too before, having been in Hawaii for 4 years and then moving 5 thousand miles back to Canada, I'll only be 2 and a half hours away...

So I am going out with my driving instructor tomorrow for 2 hours of driving time >.< Joy. Apparently his name is Gary. I'll be driving from 9:00AM until 11:00AM.

I have been waiting to get some scheduled driving time, but now I'm just nervous driving with a stranger, plus I don't drive to much, I'm not a bad driver, just a nervous one.

But that is what Gary is doing, teaching me to be a better driver.

So I tried to write my blog yesterday and just as I was finishing up, my computer decided to close the page and I lost it all...So today I am pretty much summing up what I wrote yesterday, and adding a few things.

So I talked about how my birthday is in 62 days ! and I will be 18 years old, and I have been thinking about getting a tattoo for a long time, but for about a year now I have had a solid idea of what I want...kinda, I have the idea, but I want to change it a little bit and make sure it's exactly how I want it...so, this was the original idea, I drew this and designed it...in Sharpies lol:

Then I realized it would look like a sticker, so I asked my friend Autumn for advice and she said I could add the Hawaiian flower; the Hibiscus, which I loved! But now I can't decide which colour Hibiscus would look best with this design, I would put the Hibiscus in the bottom left corner of the flag:

               

then I got to thinking, maybe instead of getting the Canadian flag, just get the Maple Leaf:

And I could put the Hawaiian islands across that and add the Hibiscus somewhere, opinions, suggestions, idea's??? and If anyone who reads this is good at drawing and wants to draw up a few ideas, that would be incredible, because I am not that great at drawing haha.

That's basically what I talked about yesterday...

I think...

I thought my room would start looking bare by now, but its really not...I'm leaving a lot of things at home. So in 35 hours, I am moving. Scary.

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

One Sick Bastard

Hello there.
So that whole rumour thing I wrote about in my last blog entry has been completely resolved, things are pretty much back to normal now. I never thought I could harbour so much hatred towards one person...this truly can't be healthy >.<
Any ways, only 5 days left until I move to Cornwall for college, it really is coming fast! I did my last minute college shopping today and got some school supplies and a new TV for my dorm room! because the TV I have in my bedroom is massive...it is ancient and bulky, so I got a 19" flat screen with a DVD player built into it! Here is the online picture of it:


It was a pretty expensive trip to Wal-Mart haha (Thanks daddy)

My new phone case finally came in the mail yesterday, I ordered it a month ago, I thought it was lost in the mail, I was pretty upset, but I finally got it!


For those of you that don't know the show House, search it up online and watch it, there are 8 seasons. The final episode aired in May this year D'x I am so sad that it's over! This guy, Hugh Laurie is the sexiest man alive.....well, right after Billy <3 xD


I have been trying to be more healthy and get fit lately...It's hard.
I work out daily, but my eating habits...aren't so great, though I do try to eat healthy..I love fruits but I am addicted to fast food restaurants and candy and unhealthy things. I'm up for healthy but yummy suggestions... My favourite healthy snacks are green apples with cheddar cheese or baby carrots with some sort of dip!

Just got an email from SLC (St. Lawrence College) It is a check-list of dorm necessities and as it would appear, I am still not done shopping yet -.- I finally thought I was too. *sigh*

I still need:
1. Alarm Clock
2. Hangers
3. Ethernet Cord

a few other things plus school supplies...Well I am going to tidy my bedroom and make sure I have everything I want to bring, I'm starting to get pretty nervous.

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

Laying All The Cards On The Table

Hello...
So today has been pretty tough for me, yesterday was too, but for different reasons...

Yesterday, somebody started a rumour about me that is untrue, even after high school, there are still people who are completely immature. This rumour was horrible and supposed to change the feelings of somebody close to me, it could have ruined a lot and really affected my life, I found out who started this rumour and I already know why; jealousy, immaturity and down right idiocy. They hate me for no good reason, I did absolutely nothing to them, they simply have nothing better to do with their life other then try to get involved and ruin mine. To make it worse they brought my best friend and her boyfriend into this rumour, making them look bad as well, they also did nothing to deserve this, even though the rumour was about me and used to hurt somebody else.
I am just happy that the person this rumour was supposed to hurt, trusts me and knows me better, if you haven't guessed who this rumour was supposed to affect yet, it was Billy, my boyfriend. I wont go on to tell you who started this rumour or what it was, but some of you may be able to guess that as well.
I had a horrible day yesterday because of it.

Now, for today, I am still bothered by that rumour, but as well, my hamster passed away, I am not one to choose favourites, but this hamster was the sweetest, and I have...had 4...I now have 3. Spider-Man was the second hamster.
I bought Mary-Jane, then later on bought Spider-Man, they had a litter of pups, I kept one and named her Alice, then a few months ago I bought Jasper.
Spider-Man and Mary-Jane are 3, almost 4 years old.
I always thought Mary-Jane would pass first, since she is older, but she is still fighting, though she is balding and has troubles walking; she often falls onto her back.
She has always been a tough hamster.
Spider-Man passed away this morning, I didn't think I would cry when my hamsters passed, but I did.
I am moving to Cornwall in 11 days, so I am glad that I was here when he passed, though I'd prefer he didn't at all. I know Mary-Jane is going to die very soon, I would rather be here when she does, but I don't want her to die before I go, because that's only 11 days.

And even more things stressing me out is college, I don't want to be so far away, now that rumour is one reason why I didn't want to leave, because I knew that that person was going to do something to try to hurt my relationship, and if I wasn't here, it could have been really bad. I know when I leave, this person will continue to try to hurt my relationship and with me not being here, it is going to be difficult to deal with.
I haven't talked to them, I don't want to stoop to their level, I don't want to name anybody, and I don't want to get into any fights, unlike them I have class (even though on the inside I want to go over to their house and beat their face in) but I won't, because I would like to keep my dignity, which they lost a long time ago.

I wont lie here, I almost called Kids Help Phone yesterday because I had no idea what to do in the situation I was put in because of this untrue rumour, instead, I told my dad and took his advice, which I am glad I did.
Everything is fine today as far as rumours go, but if that rumour is pushed again, I am going to lose it, I am sick of people having nothing better to do other than hurt people for no reason. Nobody deserves to be treated with so much disrespect.

So with that I will go, I don't want to write a novel about this because I believe my point has been stated multiple times.

I would appreciate prayers for my hamsters, it may seem silly to some people, but I do love them the same way I love my dog or my cats and even my sister, they are family.

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

Accepting The Future

Hello lovelies!

This weekend I went to the states as I posted in my last blog entry. I went to my favourite store Hot Topic as well as some amazing stores called Vanity, Deb, Kohl's and a few other places, I got a ton of new clothes! Here are just a few of the outfits I got !

The corset top and the skirt are from Hot Topic and the faux leather jacket is from Vanity

This outfit is from Hot Topic 

The shorts are from Kohl's and the shirt is from K-Mart and the bandeau is from Bon Ton
The shirt is buttoned up all the way here

The shorts are from Kohl's and the shirt are from K-Mart and the bandeau is from Bon Ton

The shorts are from Kohl's, the shirt is from K-Mart and the Bandeau is from Bon Ton
I undid the top 2 or 3 buttons here

This outfit is from Kohl's and the bandeau is from Bon Ton

The shirt is from Hot Topic, the bandeau is from Bon Ton and the pants are from Kohl's

The shirt is from Hot Topic, the bandeau is from Bon Ton and the pants are from Kohl's

This outfit is from Kohl's

This outfit is from Kohl's

I did get new shoes and jewellery as well as more college supplies and even more clothes but it was late when I took these photos so I wasn't able to get pictures of everything else I purchased in the states. 

I had a blast though. My mom of course bought candles and a few shirts and my dad bought a few shirts and a belt. I am really glad we went, we had a great time hanging out at the hotel pool and watching movies in the hotel room as well as exploring Watertown, and let's not forget eating at my favourite restaurant Texas Roadhouse! I highly recommend you guys find one and go, BEST food ever ! I also recommend their burgers, steak and spicy poppers! 

Here is the most recent picture of everything I have purchased for college so far:

   

I pretty much have all the essentials, storage bins, microwave, toaster, paper towels, dish soap, etc... Only 13 more days until I am leaving. It's coming really quick, I have people adding me on facebook who are going to also be in residence at the same college I am going to. I'm going to know everyone before I even get there haha, which is good I guess since I can be pretty shy if I don't know people.

Idk how I am going to pack up my entire room >.< It seems like so much stuff.. Also, some picture of residence were added to facebook, so here are some pictures of where I'll be living:

Obviously the bathroom I will be sharing with Melina my room mate :3

Another angle of the bathroom, the sink and shower and you can see the mini fridge outside the bathroom

You can see the bed here which can be raised and lowered to whatever my desired height is and I will set it to the highest when I get there

The computer desk and a closet type thinger lol

I believe this was taken by the door into the room

The front door, the mini fridge, closet, and computer desk

This is the residence lounge

Also the residence lounge, you can see the TV and fireplace.

Once again, the residence lounge along with the fridge that everyone in res can use

So that is the basics of residence and where I will be living, those weren't pictures of my dorm room, that was just a random one but that is the basic idea, they all look pretty much the same :3 It is gorgeous and its a  good size for me.

Side note; our bathroom is almost done and it looks awesome ! 

Our gorgeous new tub !

I am in love with our new shower

This is where our toilet used to be and will be again, new toilet though!

I really don't have much to talk about right now, just getting myself ready for college, I usually take a picture of myself everyday (for a year) and I have been distracted and busy and just keep forgetting, but I am trying to get back into the habit of taking the pictures again. Well I am going to tidy my room a little bit and then bring a few things downstairs to my pile of stuff that I am bringing to college.

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

Time Comes and Life Goes On

Hey guys.
Yesterday I started Access Driving School, I am in class for 5 and a half hours Monday - Thursday, I've already completed 2 days, only 2 more to go, then we start the actual driving...with an instructor...not one of my parents... and possibly next week I can go for my G2! But before next week, my family is going to the states for the weekend, Friday until Sunday! Not anywhere special, it's only an hour and a half from where I live now, we're going to Watertown, NY. I can't wait! Firstly, Hot Topic, I can finally go there again, my absolute FAVOURITE store! Plus I want to shop around at other stores where the style is a little bit different, more mature, but still cute. These are some things I really want that a lot of people wouldn't expect to see me wear and some things people would expect haha :3

So those are definitely not the only things I want haha, but I think you get the point, but the way I dress now with knee high socks and converse, my studded belts and all my "scene" clothing is staying :3 I'm not changing, I'm maturing, getting older. I love the way I dress now, but like my hair, I'm growing bored of always dressing the same, so I am changing it up a bit. I don't care if I get called a "poser" or a "wannabe" because I know I'm not and that's all that matters, I'm happy with my style choices even if they make no sense to other people.

I also get bored with how I do my makeup which is why I always switch around the way I do my eye liner and the colours of my eye shadows and sometimes add lipstick, because I like change, which is why I am looking forward to going to college, because it's change, new scenery, new people...But I'm scared because it's a HUGE change, not little ones like clothing, hair and makeup that I can easily just go back to if I don't like it.

Along with clothing, when I go to the states I am going to get some more college supplies, other things for my dorm room as well as actual school supplies, like binders, pens and pencils, and any other magical school supplies I may come across that I need.

College is coming really fast, only 18 more days...2 weeks and 5 days. 

Well that's all I really have time to say today, busy me >.< I hate being busy :/ No time to just relax!

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

I'm Just a Kid

Greetings earthlings,
So I am eating oatmeal for breakfast, contrary to popular belief, its actually extremely delicious!
Any ways, I start driving school tomorrow, I will be in class from 9:00AM until 2 or 3:00PM I can't remember how long class is, but I'll be doing that for the whole week, Monday - Friday. Woohoo -.- It's in class for 5 or 6 hours, yippee, but apparently it will lower the cost of my insurance a lot which is really good!
I am pretty stressed lately with all I have to do, I have driving school tomorrow and after that only 2 weeks until I leave for college, plus as soon as I get to Cornwall I have to apply for jobs everywhere because without one I can't buy any food or shampoo or books for classes or anything I will need, I still need to pack up my bedroom and make sure not to forget anything and my mind is just moving to fast for me to get words out...
Yesterday I went out with my gorgeous friend, Melina and we shopped for dorm supplies, because in just 3 weeks, we will be off to Cornwall to live together! I am excited for certain reasons and nervous and upset for others...
I have most of the things I will need; I have a microwave, toaster, dishes, and about a hundred other must-have items for my dorm room. I even picked up some wall decor..I just wish I could find a True Blood poster :/ Maybe I'll find one somewhere else before I go.
My mom is most likely taking my sister and I to the states this weekend (after driving school) and I'll be looking for a ton of things there for college, as well as back to school clothes and new shoes because all of my shoes are kind of garbage...I know I need to get more fancy...is that the right word? Classy? I don't know, maybe the word is acceptable... just more adult-like attire, to look respectable.

So I ordered a new cell phone case online because the extremely cute one I have now was ruining my screen protector :(
My new one looks like this:

So I am pretty excited to get it ! If you don't know the show House, then I guess it's not as awesome to you as it is to me. I suggest you google the show and watch some episodes of it !

Our bathroom is coming alone nicely, the shower and toilet are still not here and the floor isn't done, but the bath is usable and the walls were built up!

I feel like I am changing the subject a lot...well in 3 months I will be turning 18, only 80 days away...Melina thinks I will be the youngest girl in residence at St. Lawrence College.
I'm usually the youngest in schools though thanks to my late birthday, I know that when I turn 18 I am re-piercing my smiley, I miss it, and for those of you who don't know what it is:

This was back in July of 2011, I took it in my sisters room and yes I was wearing extensions, lol
Since I've posted this picture I've seen it online in quite a few places, people re-post it on Tumblr and DeviantArt, which for me is a bit weird having people use MY picture xS
But yes, this was my smiley piercing and I did it myself but when I turn 18 I will be having it professionally done.

Well I am going to get my day started, exercise, bathe, then start a list of things to bring to college...

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

Renovations and Changes

So I have posted a lot about this on twitter and facebook, but currently our upstairs bathroom is being renovated. We are extending our bathroom, getting a bigger tub which will have jets, a stand up shower and a new toilet. I have been taking pictures of the bathroom as the men have been working on it. Today is only day 2 of renovations and they have already done so much, the estimated time to finish the bathroom is 6 days. We are even getting new flooring and new tiles around the tub. Its undecided, but we might also paint our bathroom, but lucky me, by the time the bathroom is done, I will have a week, maybe 2 weeks before I go to Cornwall for college, meaning I won't really get to use the new bathroom for long...
The bathroom so far is looking different, its actually changed the way the upstairs hallway looks because they extended the bathroom, now it looks like our bathroom used to be very small, but it wasn't, it just wasn't as big as it is now. The walls aren't complete, the floors aren't done, we still have no stand up shower or toilet, we do have the tub, but its not hooked up and in and all that yet. I got to lay down in the tub and it is massive...well, its large, massive is not the right word to use, because it isn't that big, I can't lay straight in it like I can on a bed, but its still bigger then our old one, and deeper, a lot deeper!

My parents keep joking around saying that as soon as I leave they are renovating and turning my room into a Sauna or a weight room or something, and they don't realize how much that actually gets to me, I've told them to stop making jokes like that, because it really sinks in that I'm leaving and I don't think I'm ready to go..at least not so far away...
I'll still be coming home to visit, I'll even be home for 3 weeks in the Winter and then I'm also back all Summer, but my parents just say I can sleep in the basement...It makes me feel detached...like I'm no longer part of this family, like when I leave, that's it, I'm on my own, almost like I was never here at all, like this was never my home to begin with, like they are just waiting for me to leave so they can turn my room upside-down and into some new room of their choice. I know my parents love and care about me, I know they'll miss me, but when they talk about changing my room, it hits me that I'm growing up, I'm leaving.... and it sucks.
So many people can't wait to get away from home, to be on their own and have the freedom to do whatever they want, some of them don't realize how good they have it, how much their family does for them, maybe some people have legitimate reasons for wanting to leave, for needing to get away, but those of them that have it good, that count on their parents for things, and they just want to leave; it makes me sad...because I wish I could stay longer, or go to college somewhere closer.
My mom was going to give me her car if my college was closer, she just recently decided that if I want it still she'll give it to me and buy herself a new car, I said no, because even though having a car of my own would be amazing, I want to go through my first year of college without worrying about paying for gas or any other car expenses on top of everything else that I would have to pay for. After my first year I will decide whether or not I want her car for my second year, if I think financially I can handle it.

This is slightly off topic...okay, completely off topic, but I have ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder) and I just noticed that there is a fly buzzing around my room -.- It's distracting....Any ways, this is long enough, I will end this entry with some pictures of how the bathroom is going so far.

View from my parents bedroom

View from the hallway (top of the stairs)

New tub

Another view from my parents room, the men working on the plumbing

The walls were rebuilt in my parents room

The part of the floor that is semi-built is where the stand up shower is going

Me laying in the new tub

Life Starts Now, am I ready?

Get Ready, Get Set, Don't Go...

Hello!
So to kick start this whole blog thing I've decided to do, I am going to share with you a bit about myself.

My name is Jesse, I am 17 years old and live in Kingston Ontario...for now, in about 2 and a half weeks I am moving to Cornwall Ontario, which is 2 and a half hours from where I live now.

But I'll get to that in a bit, I'll start from the beginning...

When I was 6 years old, I started going to a babysitters house with my younger sister, her name is Velda and she is like a second mom to me, she babysat my sister and I before and after school everyday for 4 years, I wish I had more time to go and see her but I am so busy lately...

When I was 10 years old my family was posted to Hawaii, so off we went, leaving my home behind for 3 years, or so I thought, we extended a year, so we were on the beautiful island called Oahu for 4 years, where I met so many incredible people, don't get me wrong, I met my fair share of bully's along the way, but I was raised strong, so I dealt with them appropriately, I ignored them, never let their drama get to me, plus I had a great group of friends to count on!

When I was 14, we moved back home to Kingston where I began grade 10 and reconnected with some of my friends from before I moved to Hawaii, as well as making a ton of new friends! 

So grade 10 passed, then grade 11...then grade 12 came...my final year of high school, I began dating Billy, who I have been with now for 15 months as of today, I don't know where I'd be without him, he makes me beyond happy (and sometimes straight up pissed) but I love him completely, grade 12 didn't faze me in the beginning but as soon as semester 2 creeped up on me, I started to get nervous about finishing high school, because your life really doesn't start until you are done with high school and off to college.

So I applied to St. Lawrence for Journalism, but of course the St. Lawrence where I live doesn't offer Journalism, so I had to apply to the one in Cornwall, 2 and a half hours from home...I got accepted.

You can say I've been kind of spoiled, I have had only one job and it didn't work out. So my parent's have bought me pretty much everything I own, and I'm leaving, I can't rely on them any more, I have to do everything for myself, which I'm fine with, just nervous...

So here I am today, preparing for college and the journeys it brings. I am thankful that I know my dorm-mate, Melina, she is also taking Journalism and is going into her second year of college, so she can show me the ropes, help me out and all that.

I am going to share with you my experience through college, all the ups and downs, I also tweet frequently and upload youtube videos , so if you don't like to read much, you can always just check those out if you want to keep up with me :3

www.twitter.com/jeshimikah

www.youtube.com/JJJLKB

I hope you enjoy reading these blogs, because for me it will be like a public diary, which sounds kind of intimidating xS I'll be sharing with you my ups and downs, the good and bad...

Life Starts Now, am I ready?